Jun 152013

This is a genuine, reader submitted (success) story, of how Kirsty found affirmations and changed her outlook on life, love and her relationship.

My name is Kirsty and I’m more than ever, CONVINCED by the power of affirmations 😀  Imagine how we could massively move the world with those as well???

I just wanted to thank y’all, whoever you are, for doing what you did gathering all those amazing affirmations and just sharing them for free!

WOW how sweet and beautiful of you, what a true service you offer, which is why I’m writing you – to thank you. I used the confidence ones so far, including the suggested one on stopping relationship insecurity. I wanted to tell you a quick-ish story if you’re interested. Thank you again for making my life VASTLY better and helping me reach perhaps life-altering epiphany with your service 😀

I have been super duper insecure since my ex-partner had what I’d call some call un-ethical sluttery (as opposed to ethical sluttery) a few years ago, even though we were in an open relationship even (LOL how does that even happen?). Ever since then I’ve compared myself to other beautiful women, feeling inferior and insecure around them sometimes, and sometimes painfully so, like I haven’t experienced since Middle School, trying so hard to fit and failing so miserably until I finally said “F*CK IT!” and started being myself after Middle School which was one of the most liberating moments of my life 😉

What happened today feels like the same thing as my Middle School epiphany/liberation like 12 years later! 😀

Ryan Gosling

So now I’m in like literally the most beautiful perfect relationship for me ever ever. He is everything I wrote down in my law of attraction “magic book.” He is beautiful (guilty, one of the first things I want), muscular cuz he works out (I do too – two of the only occupiers (what we call people in the Occupy Wall Street Movement) who do ;-D), ridiculous in bed like beyond freakin belief (sorry babe), still a year later/more so,  a hardcore serious organizer for movements for social justice, like Occupy, workers’ rights organizing, and to save Troy Davis and stop wars etc (I need that in anyone I sleep with and most especially the person I want to really be with cuz no one understands an activist like an activist I feel like, we need to be a team cuz change need to COME!), he has an amazing personality, always grounded, calm, funny, warm, moral, respectful and sensitive to privilege, and has such intergrity, a need to contribute, solidarity, and peace and love in his heart. And he treats me like I deserve (like we all deserve!) which is like a Goddess, and makes me feel loved and cherished and supported all the time.

And even then, even though he’s so perfect and loving (and we get told we’re the cutest couple all the time), over the last year we’ve been together (one year anniversary March 25), my insecurity has caused me to kind of freak out emotionally about nothing for like the last 6 months or more. I certainly me don’t mean to invalidate my feelings, or say that he didn’t have a part in anything in particular. But no one can really make you feel bad but you, and I felt so horrible and afraid inside and he didn’t know how to comfort me – I didn’t really know how to comfort myself, but he tried really hard and often succeeded, just not permanently, and I found ways of coping and some self-soothing eventually, it just never went away, just slightly improved…maybe, but not really, to the point where he said he wasn’t sure if we were actually perfect for each other if we fought like this (nothing really nasty, just stress mainly, but still, not cool if unnecessary fights/stress).

We basically had a weekly fight and it was mostly my fault because I would get so insecure that despair overtook me, which you can imagine would get exhausting to him, especially when he tries to deal with his feelings internally so often. But it would cripple me, and stress and depress him.

So all day today, like many days now but especially today, while we were laying and hanging and talking together on the couch for like three hours, I basically tried not to be embarrassed and just asked him straight out what I wanted to know and hear him say that would make me feel less insecure about myself, the specific type of reassurance I felt I needed to feel reassured, even though it made no rational sense for me to be insecure about these things, but we had a great talk today and he told me what I wanted to hear and meant it. He has always been patient with me, but he was incredibly, openly empathetic to me tonight partially as a result of today and therapy perhaps and our good-ness for one another (at the strip club, where I work, too!) and it was so nice to be supported and embraced in that weak state, which is what I feel I wanted all along and which he tried to do.

I had a final fit of crippling insecurity tonight at the club about not being good enough to dance with those other women and how I was so worried he’d secretly want me to look like them instead and I can’t, etc, which always obviously feels like sh*t for anyone involved in that insecure energy at all, so me and him mainly. I said several times aloud “I don’t want to be insecure. I hate feeling like this, and I remember when I didn’t, or making you feel bad because of it. It doesn’t actually help anything to be insecure, does it? Not a DARN thing! Can’t think of anything that would be worth the trade off for being insecure. There’s literally no reason for it. I think being insecure/a lack of confidence is one my most major problems, especially in my relationship. Yeah – that’s a huge common thread of some of my most major problems, a major worry that infects every part of my life with poison, and it’s not necessary.”

And then, when I got home, I wanted to make sure I didn’t get insecure in bed or for the rest of the night, etc. I knew I had no reason to get insecure and it was slowly dawning on me and I was slowly talking myself up to starting to let go. Then, I got on the ol’ comp and looked up “confidence affirmations” to see  your site. Beautiful!

When I read your confidence affirmations, on inferiority, insecurity, wanting to feel beautiful and relationship insecurity I knew I could change – NOW – just like that. It’s that easy to just – let go – when you’re ready. And I was ready. AND WHEN I WAS READY YOU WERE THERE, ALL PERFECT AND ON POINT.

So literally right now I feel an immense freedom, that I can just let go of insecurity, basically completely, and be super duper confident, now, right now, and from now on. I will choose THAT positive choice of confidence over insecurity NOW. I feel like I’m so surprised how easy it was for that to happen, I thought I’d have to get hypnotized (I was imagining aloud with him how to address this, which I had finally identified explicitly in my mind), or work for like forever to slowly and painfully get less insecure and more confident, but it seemed impossible to just let go of.

But it wasn’t impossible. I just let go of insecurity, feelings of inadequacy, inferiority, and panic. And I have embraced full self-confidence, self-appreciation, and un-conditional self love, which I think are some of the most basic needs we have. Your free affirmations were the straw that broke the camel’s back and made it real.

“Release the old which no longer serves you and embrace the new.” -Kali, the Goddess.

It was really that easy, because I was ready, I was supported and loved and empathized with by others, and I found you. Thank you for being there for me and showing me the way, for free, easily and lovingly. I think my life just seriously changed today and GODDESS I needed that, WHEW!

You totally changed my life so thank you from me for that one and probably from him though he doesn’t believe in affirmations or the law of attraction yet but he may now ;-D

Thank you Soooooooo much for this story, to hopefully share affirmations with people to create experiences like this is why I started this site and I loved reading your story. For full transparency, “Kirsty” has asked to remain anonymous, and she isn’t really dating Ryan Gosling.

Check out our affirmations for confidence, and relationships – to read the exact affirmations that Kirsty has read and used.